Season 3, Episode 31: "Kazu's Upgrade"
English Version Written by: 
Original Air Date: 
Transcribed by: SteelWarrior (steelwarrior98@aol.com)

In the Land of the Digimon Sovereign Calumon floats to a red castle in a ball with a cage door.

Calumon: Oh, and I thought Impmon was my friend. But I guess he doesn’t know the meaning of the word, he probably doesn’t even know the meaning of meaning, except for the mean part. Well, at least the sunset’s pretty.

He looks again and sees a pointy castle.

Calumon: Wait, if that’s a sunset then the sun’s gotten awfully pointy. Oh, I don’t like the looks of that.

In the desert the kids walk.

Kazu: Uh, I wonder if this world’s ever heard of the word shade.

Jeri: I hope Calumon’s okay.

Leomon: If Calumon’s so important that they’d kidnap him then they’ll treat him well, I’m sure.

Jeri: Do you think that’s right, Rika?

Rika: I don’t know, Jeri. Grow up.

Jeri: Wh-what?

Rika: Quit acting like a baby.

Jeri: Huh, what do you mean?

Rika: You’re a tamer now, so get tough.

Jeri: Uh, oh.

Guilmon: Oh...

Jeri: This is so new, I’ll try harder.

Rika: We just don’t have the luxury of being soft, you have to learn that this isn’t a game, Jeri. There’s serious stuff at stake here.

Renamon: Rika, she said she’d try harder so let it go, would you.

Rika: Mm, Renamon’s right, I’m sorry Jeri.

Jeri: Mm...kay...mm hm, hm.

Guilmon, Kazu, Kenta, and Leomon smile.

Renamon: Hm.

Kazu: Now that we’ve gotten today’s argument out of the way can we get back to finding Takato and the guys?

Guilmon: Why’d you have to remind me about Takato?

Kenta: Guilmon, maybe you could become my partner digimon instead. What do ya say?

Guilmon: Takato’s my tamer, haven’t you been paying attention?

Kenta: Hey! Come on buddy! Imagine us as digimon tamer and partner, it’ll be great!

Guilmon runs and Kenta chases.

Kenta: I’ll make you banana splits everyday!

Kazu runs after them.

Kazu: Guys wait!

He sinks into the ground.

Kazu: Whoa!

The rest do.

All: Ah!

Kenta and Guilmon watch.

Guilmon: Uh?

Kenta: Where did they go?

They sink too.

They all fall into a pit and end up in a forest with a lake in the middle.

Renamon falls first and catches Rika.

Kazu falls on his back and Leomon holding Jeri falls.

Kazu: Nice catch, Renamon.

Kazu (thinking): This just can’t get any worse.

He looks up.

Kazu: Ah!!!

Guilmon and Kenta: Ah!!!!!!!!!!!!

They fall on Kazu.

Jeri: You guys okay?

Kenta: Yeah, except for being really hurt.

Guilmon: Oh. Now we’ll never find Takato.

In a bright light Takato, Henry, and Terriermon fall.

All: Ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Takato: Where are we goin’ anyway?!

Henry: You really think I have any idea?

Terriermon: Moumantai!

Henry: Oh moumantai yourself!

In the forest.

Rika: Oh, well there’s plenty of shade here.

Renamon: Yes, but where is here?

Guilmon smells the water.

Digimon: Orochimon!

Jeri: Who’s that?

Rika: He’s over there, come on!

They run to the sound.

Renamon: Rika!

Digimon: Orochimon come out!

He picks up a boulder.

Digimon: This’ll get his attention.

He throws it in the lake.

Digimon: And hopefully do a little damage!

Jeri steps on a twig and it catches the Digimon’s attention.

Digimon: Hm? Well, aren’t you a motley bunch. And what do you want, I wonder.

Rika: Go on, Renamon.

She jumps in front of Rika.

Jeri: You too, Leomon.

He walks forward and grabs his sword.

Leomon: Hm.

Kenta: Guilmon!

Guilmon: Huh?

Kenta: Heh, heh. Okay I know I’m not your tamer, but would you mind anyway?

Guilmon: Don’t worry Kenta, I’ll protect you guys.

Digimon: So Orochimon has sent you to fight, has he?

Guilmon: Huh?

Leomon: Orochimon? Who in the world is that?

Digimon: Well he’s the digimon who rules this area.

Renamon: And who are you?

Digimon: A humble servant in the fight for good, Andromon the Just.

Guilmon: Just what?

Rika gets his data.

Rika: Well he’s not lying, Andromon, ultimate level.

They look at Andromon and a wave emerges behind him.

Kenta: Look!

All: Uh!

They see a snake digimon with 8 heads emerge from the water.

Kazu: Run!

Kenta: Don’t have to tell me twice!

The kids run away and the digimon prepare to fight.

Andromon: Stand back! It’s my fight! Gatling Attack!

Two missiles shoot from his chest at Orochimon and do nothing.

Andromon: Oh dear.

Two heads hit Andromon into a tree.

Jeri: Orochimon, ultimate level, special attack Inferno Blast.

Guilmon: An ultimate? He’s gonna be difficult to defeat if I can’t digivolve.

Kenta: Well, give it a shot would ya?

Leomon: Don’t worry, we shall protect you.

The black head looks at the kids and focuses on Jeri.

Kenta: How bout sometime today, huh?

He moves his head closer to Jeri.

Leomon: Hey, step back beast!

Leomon stands in front of Jeri with his sword.

Leomon: Or slither back!

Orochimon: Hm.

Light reflects off Leomon’s sword and Orochimon moves back.

Jeri: Uh, uh...

Kenta: He’s leaving! Leomon you did it!

He sinks into the water looking at Jeri.

Orochimon: Hm, hm, hm, hm, hm, hm.

Kenta: But why was he...staring at Jeri?

Kazu runs to Andromon.

Kazu: Andromon’s hurt. Is he even alive?

Jeri: Yeah, but just barely.

Rika: Huh?

She looks over and sees smoke.

Rika: Hey, look over there, maybe it’s a village where we can get help.

In the light.

Takato: I never thought falling could get so boring. We gotta find a way to get outta here.

Henry: Might as well try. Grab hold!

He grabs Takato’s hand and reaches for Terriermon.

Henry: Uh, Terriermon!

He grabs Terriermon’s ear.

Henry: Hold on!

He swings them to the black on the side.

At the village.

Jeri: Yep it’s a village alright.

Rika: Nothing gets past you, does it?

Jeri: Well I-hey!

Guilmon, Renamon, and Leomon set Andromon down.

Jeri: Something smells familiar.

Rika walks to the window.

Rika: Yeah, seems to be coming from in here.

She looks in the window.

Rika: Check it out guys.

They look.

Kazu and Kenta: Huh!

Guilmon: Oh.

They see Gekomon tossing each other data packets.

Guilmon: Hey, what are those guys doing?

Kenta: Looks like a factory.

Rika: Duh!

Guilmon smells the air.

Jeri: You smell that too?

Everyone smells the air.

Jeri: It’s milkshakes.

Leomon: Hm?

Kazu and Kenta: Yeah!

Jeri: They’re the specialty at my family’s restaurant, I’d recognize that smell anywhere.

A Gekomon comes out from behind barrels.

Gekomon: Well you can’t have any of ours.

They turn.

All: Huh?

Gekomon: And make sure you keep your grubby hands off the equipment.

Inside the Gekomon are mixing the milk.

Gekomon: That’s 100% pure digital data they’re mixin’ in. get it dirty and the shakes are worthless.

Leomon: Look, we just want to get some help for our friend, Andromon.

Gekomon: That lousy Andromon!

Jeri: Lousy? But he’s a humble servant in the fight for good.

Gekomon: Great! They’ll be more trouble!

Renamon: What’s wrong?

Leomon: Yes he seems like a nice enough guy.

Gekomon: You have no idea what he’s done to us!

Guilmon: Well we would if you told us.

Kenta: Don’t be childish, we need his help, I’m sure he’d tell us if he wanted to.

Guilmon: According to you and Takato everything’s childish.

Gekomon: Uh, I didn’t want to have to tell this story again, but...

Flashback to the Gekomon singing by the lake.

Gekomon (narrating): We used to live in peace, happily filling the air with our beautiful singing. But that didn’t last long.

From the sky falls Orochimon into the lake.

Orochimon: Rah! You slimy singers shall serve me!

Gekomon: Serve you? But how oh big teethy and fangy one? All we know how to do is sing.

Orochimon: Thas produce milkshakes!

Gekomon: But you’re so large, oh sure to be causing lots of pain one. We could never make enough shakes to-

Orochimon growls at them.

Gekomon: Okay, okay! Data shakes a plenty comin’ right up!

Orochimon smiles.

End flashback.

Gekomon: Well I hope you’re happy, making me relive that horrible memory.

Jeri: But I don’t understand what that has to do with Andromon.

Gekomon: I was going to get to that part next, haven’t you heard of building dramatic tension?

Flashback to the Gekomon mixing shakes.

Gekomon (narrating): To keep the peace, we devoted all our energies to makin’ milkshakes for that hideous creature.

The Gekomon pour milkshakes into holders.

Gekomon (narrating): Everyday we’d have to drag them down to the lake and if we didn’t he’d attack us.

The Gekomon pull a big barrel of milkshakes to the lake.

Gekomon: Come and get your milkshake! Here shaky, shaky, shaky, shaky milkshakes!

Orochimon gets up and strikes into the milkshake and drinks it.

Gekomon (narrating): You know, I really think he’s really starting to mellow out.

Gekomon: That thing has got a sweet tooth the size of Mt. Fuji.

End flashback.

Jeri: But Andromon?

Gekomon: I’m gettin’ to that! Relax already! See everything was going along nice and peaceful, but then this blowhard comes along and says he wants to fight Orochimon and set us free or some garbage.

Flashback to Andromon first talking to the Gekomon.

Andromon: We can win! With your help I can defeat Orochimon and drive him out of the pond forever!

Gekomon: Hey don’t rock the boat! Or at least not our boat, rock your own stupid boat!

Andromon: Very well then, I will.

He turns and leaves.

Gekomon (narrating) :But would he listen? No! now he and Orochimon fight like it’s goin’ out of style. And every time they do they wreck everything around here. You know how many times we’ve had to rebuild this factory?

All: No.

Gekomon: Well it’s a lot of times, what’d ya think I was gonna say?

End flashback.

Gekomon: It’s his own stupid fault he’s hurt! So if you think I’m gonna help this guy your two seeds shy of a milkweed pod!

Kazu: Look I know you’re upset, but Andromon’s just doing what he thinks is best to help you guys.

Leomon: That’s right and we wouldn’t need much help from you at all, just a couple of the data packets you put into the milkshakes.

Kazu: Really that’s it?

Leomon: I believe so.

Kazu grabs Gekomon’s hands.

Kazu: So help us already!

Gekomon: But he’ll find out.

Kazu: You’ve gotta learn to stand up for yourselves or someone like Orochimon will walk all over you.

Gekomon: You’re right, I will. Starting tomorrow.

Against a tree Kazu pours milkshake onto Andromon.

Jeri: This is weird.

Kenta: Why? Milkshakes always make me feel better.

Renamon: The data will heal him.

Andromon feels pain.

Jeri: Well at least he’s awake now, right?

Leomon: Yeah.

Rika: What are those data packets anyway?

Guilmon holds the data packets.

Leomon: They’re like medicine for digimon, they restore data that’s been destroyed or corrupted.

Jeri: What would we do without you, Leomon?

Kazu: Is this guy like the bravest digimon or what? Fighting Orochimon all by himself.

Andromon glows.

All: Uh!

He de-digivolves.

Rika: He turned into Guardromon, champion level. Special attack Guardian Barrage.

Renamon: He must’ve lost a lot of energy during the fight.

Rika: Yeah but at least his wounds have healed.

Orochimon reaches his tail out and grabs Jeri.

Leomon: Jeri!

Rika: We’ve gotta do something!

Jeri: Ah!!!!!!!

Kenta: But Guilmon can’t digivolve, Guardromon’s out cold, and how do you defeat this guy anyway?

Orochimon runs through the forest with Leomon, Renamon, Guilmon, Rika, and Kenta following.

Leomon: Don’t worry Jeri, I’ll save you!

Jeri: If you wouldn’t mind!

Kazu: Hey wait up!

Guardromon: Oh nuts and bolts.

Kazu: Uh, huh?

He stops and turns.

Leomon: Jeri!

Guilmon: Leomon wait!

He dives in.

Guilmon: He’s too strong for you to fight alone!

Leomon swims faster.

Guilmon: Takatomon, where are you when I need you?

Orochimon: Inferno Blast!

Leomon dives under.

Orochimon swims away.

Jeri: Oh no Leomon! You better not have hurt him, you big, mean, old snake in the grass! Ah!

At the shore Leomon pops up.

Leomon: I failed you, Jeri.

Guilmon: Don’t worry Leomon, we’ll get her back.

Leomon: Even if it costs me every ounce of my data.

In the middle of the lake is a mountainous island.

Orochimon: Sling us some shakes, servant!

Jeri: Okay, man he’s even meaner than the customers at the restaurant. Um, you didn’t hear that part, did you?

Orochimon: And serve speedily, wretch!

Jeri: Why do boys always have to be so snotty? Jeesh.

She pours some milkshake into the bowl.

Orochimon: Your service pleases us.

Jeri: Thanks, I always do get the biggest tips.

Orochimon: You shall live.

Jeri: And that’s my best tip yet.

One head takes the bowl from another.

Jeri: You know, if you guys just have some patience and wait your turn I’ll feed you all.

Orochimon: You shall, for you shall stay our servant always.

Jeri (thinking): If I can just get them full of warm shakes maybe they’ll fall asleep and I can escape.

Jeri: Of course, master.

Orochimon: Thou does please us or be destroyed!

Jeri: Right, please you good, displease you horrible death.

Jeri (thinking): Drink up then it’s nighty night for all of you or else it’ll be nighty night for me.

On the land.

Leomon: Hm! Even if Jeri is used to working in a restaurant here’s no way she can handle a tough customer like Orochimon. It’s my fault for letting her get into danger in the first place.

Rika: She’ll be fine, we’ll save her.

Renamon: Of course, but we better get to her soon.

Leomon looks at his fist and growls.

At the tree Kazu fans Guardromon.

Kazu: Man, I sure hope those guys are okay.

Guardromon: Oh, did you say someone needs help?

Kazu: Guardromon you’re awake.

He gets up and falls down.

Guardromon: Orochimon.

Kazu: You’re still too weak to fight.

Guardromon: How shameful, who are you anyway?

Kazu: Kazu.

Guardromon: Thank you Kazu and I think I know a way to rescue your friend.

Kazu: Huh?

At the shore.

Leomon: We’ve got to go after her.

Guilmon: But how are we supposed to get across the water?

Kenta: I think we need a big boat or something.

Rika: There’s no something about it, that’s exactly what we need.

Leomon: Well then let’s build a boat!

Kazu: Hey you guys!!!!!! Guardromon’s come up with an amazing plan for us to save Jeri!

All: Huh?

He reaches them.

Kazu: Man I’m out of shape.

At the factory.

Gekomon: It’s time to deliver the milkshakes boys! Put on your travelin’ flippers!

A Gekomon hit’s a gong and the Gekomon move out hauling a carrier of shakes.

Gekomon: And this time don’t be takin’ any free samples, got it Johnson?

Johnson: How come Orochimon has all the fun?

Gekomon #2: You wanna tell him you drank his milkshakes?

Johnson: Okay, nobody touches the shakes.

They reach a hill and see Guardromon and stop.

Gekomon #2: Hey check it out, it’s Guardromon.

Gekomon #3: What’s he doin’ in the middle of the road?

Gekomon: Hey shorty, yeah you, get outta the way already!

Guardromon: Orochimon has kidnapped one of these kind people, we need your help to get her back and maybe to defeat Orochimon once and for all.

Leomon: Yes, please help us, we can’t do it without you. Gekomon: Hm. Hm.

He turns his head away.

Rika: Please help us.

Gekomon: Hm, nah!

Guilmon: Hm, but we said please.

Kazu and Kenta: Pretty please even?

Gekomon: Hey quit tuggin’ on my heartstrings already, we won’t fight Orochimon cause we love peace. And we love keepin’ ourselves in one piece.

Guardromon: Slaving over milkshakes, always worrying about attacks by Orochimon, is that the peace you’re talking about?

The Gekomon look at each other.

Guardromon: I thought that peace for you Gekomon meant singing all day, or at least what you call singing.

The Gekomon look at each other again.

Gekomon: Okay, if it means we can sing again we’ll help you.

Guardromon: Thank you, good friends.

Gekomon: So what do we have to do?

Guardromon: Just deliver the milkshake trunks as usual, we’ll take care of the rest.

The Gekomon swim the trunks across the water.

The trunk lids are slightly open.

Kenta: I sure hope this works.

Kazu: It has to!

Leomon: Hold on, Jeri, I’m coming.

Guilmon: Tell her we’re all coming, she’ll feel better that way.

Gekomon: We’re almost there, guys!

At the mountainous island all the heads are asleep except for the main one.

Jeri (thinking): Finally they’re asleep. The plan worked like a charm, well a charm with one big, huge, gaping flaw I guess.

Jeri :Are you sure you don’t wanna take a nap?

She pours more milkshake.

Jeri: How bout some more milkshakes, huh? They’re rich in milky goodness.

Orochimon: Hm, hm.

He drinks some.

Jeri: Sleep already, you’ve already had like twelve cows worth of milk.

Gekomon: Special delivery.

Jeri: Huh?

Gekomon: Another batch of milkshakes for ya, oh gruesome one.

Orochimon: Ah!

He drops the bowl.

Leomon and Guilmon move the lid off one of the boxes. Rika, Kazu, Renamon, and Kenta move the lid off the other.

Orochimon moves in, Leomon and Renamon bust out of the box and punch Orochimon and land.

The Gekomon run away as Guardromon breaks through the other box and Guilmon does as well.

Jeri runs to them.

Jeri: I’ve been feeding him warm milkshakes to get him tired so I can escape. He should be so tuckered out by now he’ll be easy to defeat.

Gekomon: Oh no!

Jeri: What do you mean ‘oh no’? That’s good, right?

Gekomon: It would be good except the data in the milkshakes’ll make him stronger.

Jeri: Oh no, I forgot that.

Leomon: Don’t worry Jeri, we’ll beat him no matter how many milkshakes he’s had.

All the heads get up.

Guilmon: We should’ve had some milkshakes too, after all, there’s nothing more important than a healthy diet.

Jeri: But what if...you guys get hurt? It’ll be all my fault.

Leomon: No it’ll be Orochimon’s fault.

One gray head goes after Leomon but he jumps up and gets his sword and jumps on the neck and stabs it.

Orochimon: Ah!

Rika: Get him Renamon!

Renamon jumps up.

Renamon: Power Paw!

Her fists and feet glow and she kicks one head and deletes it.

Kenta: I’m not your tamer, but get in there!

Guilmon: No argument here, Kenta! Pyro Sphere!

He deletes one head.

Leomon deletes a head and Orochimon’s tail strikes Leomon in the back, Renamon, and throws Guilmon.

Orochimon snickers.

Leomon: What’s so funny?

Orochimon: Nothing, except that the snakes you sought to silence are simply simulations.

Guilmon: What? They’re fake?

The three heads deleted grow back.

Jeri: Oh o! will we ever be able to defeat him?

Leomon: Uh, everyone go after the center head only!

Leomon blocks Orochimon’s tail with his sword.

Orochimon: Inferno Blast!

Leomon jumps back after being in the fire.

Renamon jumps up.

Renamon: Diamond Storm!

The ice leaves hit.

Renamon: He’s not even hurt.

Guilmon: Pyro Sphere!

Orochimon: Ah!!! Inferno Blast!

Jeri: This really is all my fault, if I just hadn’t given him all those stupid milkshakes.

Kazu: Jeri you’re a tamer now and as much as I hate to admit this, Rika’s right, you gotta get tough!

Guardromon: Nothing’s working, we’ve got to change our tactics. If only I weren’t still too injured to fight.

Jeri: We’ve got to change our tactics? Wait a minute.

She takes out 4 cards.

Jeri: Uh, perfect!

She pick a LadyDevimon card out of the 4.

Jeri: He won’t be expecting this! Digi-Modify! LadyDevimon Activate!

Kazu and Kenta: LadyDevimon activate?

Leomon glows , gets up, and roars.

Leomon: Darkness Wave!

He shoots a black beam at Orochimon who snickers then gets deleted.

Leomon: That wasn’t so tough.

Jeri: Yeah right.

Rika: Nice job.

Kenta: Now that’s what I call being a tough tamer!

Gekomon: As thanks for gettin’ rid of Orochimon here’s our most beautiful song. Okay everybody, are you ready? A one and a two and a.

They start singing and they’re singing sounds like burps.

Guardromon: That gets worse every time I hear it.

Kazu laughs and a glowing ball floats in front of Kazu.

Kazu: Huh?

Guardromon: Eh?

Kazu: Oh...

The ball floats down to Kazu’s cupped hands.

Kazu: A digivice? For me? No way. I can’t believe it, I’m really a tamer.

Guardromon: I can’t believe it, you’re my partner.

Kazu jumps on Guardromon.

Kazu: Oh that’s right buddy! I’m your partner!

Rika: Huh?

Jeri: Hey congrats.

Kenta: Great, now everyone’s got a partner except me! I’ll probably get stuck with Boringdramon or something!

They all laugh.

Kenta: No fair!

Guilmon: Not everyone has a partner, where are you Takato?

Takato, Henry, and Terriermon: Ah!!!!!!!!!!!

After being in the dark area Takato, Henry, and Terriermon are submerged in water.